It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Randomize
