Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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