Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I can tuck mytits in my pants
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
