1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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