marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
