This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
