From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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