CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
My liver just had a heart attack.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
