Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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