i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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