dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Randomize
