"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
