i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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