your room smells of hookers.
And success
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
