she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
