sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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