I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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