I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Text me some of your sweat
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