she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize