I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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