every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
