matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
