Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Randomize
