you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
