He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
True but thats because hes a fetus.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Who did Billy Mays play for?
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
