i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
