The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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