there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
