Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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