Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
