I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
