1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Having a random hookup so left but love u
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize