now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize