fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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