Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Randomize