So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
never play flip cup with pint glasses
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
