Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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