It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
