Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
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