I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Randomize
