Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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