he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Randomize
