Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
