Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize
