OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
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