Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Randomize
