Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
my sisters under your porch take her home
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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