yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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