hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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