Having a random hookup so left but love u
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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