doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
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